I’m 30 years old, married to Andrew, who’s 33, and together we have a six-month-old baby girl named Susie. She’s everything to me—her laughter is the sweetest sound, her chubby cheeks are irresistible, and her smile brightens my entire day. But despite all the love I have for her, things between my husband and me weren’t going so well.
A month ago, I caught a brut@l v!rus. It wasn’t COVID-19, nor RSV, but it h!t me hard with body @ches, chills, and a persistent c0ugh that made it feel like my ribs were being pounded from the inside out. And to top it off, Susie had just gotten over her own cold, which left me exhausted and with little energy to care for her.
I expected Andrew to step up, to support me, and take some of the load off my shoulders, but I was wrong. It wasn’t just my illness that was starting to affect things. For weeks before I even got s!ck, Andrew had been acting distant. He was always on his phone, laughing at things he wouldn’t share, and snapping at me over the smallest things. I didn’t feel like I could ask him for help, even though I was struggling.
Then one night, my fever spiked to 102.4°F, and I was barely able to sit up. I turned to Andrew, who was sitting on the couch, and with all the strength I could muster, I whispered, “Can you please take Susie? I just need to lie down for 20 minutes.”
Andrew looked at me blankly, as if I had asked him to perform an impossible task. “I can’t. Your c0ugh is keeping me up. I NEED SLEEP. I think I’m going to stay at my mom’s for a few nights.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. He actually packed a bag and walked out without even saying goodbye to me, leaving me s!ck and alone with our daughter.
That was the moment I realized that I had been taken for granted. Instead of helping me, he decided to leave me to fend for myself while he sought comfort at his mother’s house.
I spent the next few days doing everything on my own—feeding Susie, changing her diapers, comforting her when she cried. All the while, Andrew was away, not even checking in to see how we were doing.
But as I sat in my apartment, frustrated and feeling abandoned, a thought started to form in my mind: I was going to show Andrew exactly what it felt like to be left behind.
A week later, when I was feeling somewhat better, I texted Andrew: “Hey babe. I’m feeling much better now. You can come home.”
Andrew replied almost immediately. “Thank God! I’ve barely slept here. Mom’s dog snores and she keeps asking me to help with yard work.”
I shook my head. This was the same man who had left me alone to care for our daughter while I was s!ck, and now he was complaining about his mother’s dog?
I spent the next few hours getting everything ready for his return. I cleaned the house, prepped Susie’s food, and made his favorite meal—spaghetti carbonara with garlic bread. I even put on makeup for the first time in weeks and wore jeans that weren’t stained with baby food or spit-up.
When Andrew walked in, he didn’t notice a thing. He smiled, ate like a king, and immediately collapsed onto the couch, scrolling through his phone. He didn’t even acknowledge how hard I had worked during his absence.
That’s when I decided to take action.
“Hey,” I said, trying to keep my voice sweet. “Can you hold Susie for a sec? I need to grab something upstairs.”
“Sure,” he muttered, distracted by his phone.
Five minutes later, I came downstairs with a small suitcase and my car keys. He blinked in confusion. “What’s that?”
“I booked a weekend spa retreat,” I said calmly. “Massage, facial, room service. I just need some rest.”
“Wait, you’re going now?” he asked, clearly thrown off.
“Yep. Just two nights. I left instructions for you. Bottles are labeled, her toys are there, diapers and wipes are stocked. Emergency numbers are on the fridge. I got lots of groceries. Everything’s good. Unlike you, I actually planned ahead for you. Besides, you’re the dad. You know how to handle this stuff,” I said with a calm smile.
Andrew seemed stunned. “I don’t know what to—”
I raised a hand. “No, no. Your words last week, remember? ‘You’re the mom. You know how to handle this stuff better than me.’ Now it’s your turn.”
Andrew opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. I didn’t wait for him to say anything else. I grabbed my suitcase and walked out the door.
The next 48 hours were blissful. I checked into a cozy inn with a beautiful spa and took time for myself. I had massages, pedicures, and quiet moments to read a book by the fire. For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t catering to anyone else’s needs. I was doing exactly what I needed for myself.
Andrew tried to reach me twice during that time—once with a panicked voicemail and once with a guilt-ridden call. But I didn’t answer. I wasn’t ready to forgive him yet.
When I returned home, I was greeted with a complete disaster. The house was a mess—dirty bottles, toys everywhere, and Andrew, still wearing the same shirt from the day before, looking like he hadn’t slept in days.
Susie ran up to me, squealing with excitement, and I scooped her up, kissing her all over. She was fine, though clearly a little clingy from the chaos of the past two days.
Andrew stood there, exhausted and ashamed. “I get it now,” he whispered. “I really do.”
“Do you?” I asked, keeping my voice calm.
He nodded, sheepishly. “I messed up.”
I pulled out a folded paper from my purse and laid it on the table. It wasn’t divorce papers—though it could’ve been, at that point. Instead, it was a list. A schedule. A list of responsibilities for both of us.
“You don’t get to tap out anymore,” I said firmly. “I need a partner, not a third child.”
Andrew nodded slowly. “Okay. I’m in.”
Since that day, Andrew has stepped up. He wakes up when Susie cries at night, he helps with her bottles, and he even managed to change a diaper without making a face. But I’m not in a rush to forgive him completely. I’m still watching, still deciding.
But one thing’s for sure: I’m no longer the woman you can walk all over. And I’ll make sure Andrew knows that, every single day.
What Can We Learn from This Story?
Know Your Worth: You deserve to be treated with respect and not taken for granted, especially in a relationship. Never let anyone make you feel like you’re not enough.
Set Boundaries: When someone continuously crosses the line, it’s important to set clear boundaries. Whether it’s in a marriage, friendship, or family dynamic, setting limits can help restore balance.
Self-Care is Key: It’s not selfish to take care of yourself. Sometimes, you need to prioritize your own well-being to be able to support others.
Actions Speak Louder than Words: Don’t just talk about what you’re going to do—show your partner how you need to be treated by acting on your values and setting an example.
If you were inspired by this story, share it with your friends. It might just be the reminder they need to set boundaries and stand up for themselves.
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