My stomach turned. Someone had tried to access the core of my grid system. Not just the charging port. This was the brain of the whole operation.
I ran back inside and pulled the security footage from my backyard camera, one of the many I had installed after the previous incident. There, clear as daylight at 2:46 a.m., was Karen, dressed in all black like she was auditioning for a low-budget spy movie, crouching beside my panel, using a small tool to try and pry open the lock. She kept looking over her shoulder, then at one point cursed out loud when her screwdriver slipped. She had no gloves, no mask, just pure arrogant confidence.
I watched her struggle for a few minutes, then give up and storm off, but not before flipping off the camera like it was personal.
I sat back, breathing slowly, trying to decide if I was more impressed by her persistence or disgusted by her stupidity. She had already been suspended from the HOA board, was facing civil action, and had her Tesla half-fried on camera, and still she thought she could sneak onto my property and tamper with an electrical system she clearly didn't understand. If she had succeeded, she could have shorted out a major segment of my battery bank, maybe even caused an electrical fire. At that point, it wasn't just entitlement, it was criminal recklessness.
That night, I backed up all the video evidence and sent it to my lawyer. Then I called the local sheriff's office.
The deputy who came out was named Morales, and he was one of those rare types: calm, intelligent, and genuinely amused by stupidity. After reviewing the footage, he shook his head and said, "Well, she's got guts. I'll give her that. No brains, but guts." He took a statement, marked it as trespassing and attempted vandalism, and assured me they'd pay Karen a visit.
Sure enough, the next day, two patrol cars parked in front of her house. I watched from my office window as she stood on her porch in fuzzy slippers, arguing with the officers while holding a cup of herbal tea like it was a shield. Her voice carried loud enough for me to hear her say the words, "This is harassment. He's weaponizing the system against me."
That was rich coming from someone who had literally tried to invade my property twice and siphoned off dozens of dollars' worth of power over weeks. I figured that was the end of it. Law enforcement was involved now; she'd have to back off.