"I'll think about the metrics," I said.
She left the house visibly frustrated, her fake smile evaporating before she even reached the driveway. The pie stayed untouched on the table; I had survived twenty years of federal service by never eating anything brought into my kitchen by a suspect under investigation. For all I knew, she had laced it with her particular brand of crazy.
At 11:30 p.m. on day forty-eight, my security system threw a sharp red alert: *Motion detected at the rear entry.*
I pulled up the feed to see Jackson Calloway wearing a dark hoodie, using a crowbar to try to jimmy the deadbolt on my back door. He wasn't even wearing gloves. I dialed 911 instantly, then walked to the kitchen door and spoke loudly through the wood.
"The police are already en route, Jackson. And I am heavily armed. Clear off my property right now."
The heavy iron crowbar clattered loudly against the concrete patio as he turned and sprinted back across the lawn. I stepped outside using a clean kitchen towel to bag the tool, preserving the handle area out of pure evidence habit.
Sergeant Nyland arrived eight minutes later with his lights flashing. The kid never learned; they arrested Jackson at his mother's house twenty minutes later for attempted burglary—his second felony arrest in three weeks.
At 1:00 a.m., Deandra had a complete meltdown on the community page:
> *“This monster has targeted my son again, planting false evidence on his own property! Someone needs to stop this unstable individual before he inflicts harm on our children! 42 Larkspur Lane.”*
She posted my exact physical address, explicitly calling for community action against my property. My phone didn't stop buzzing with alerts, but by morning, over sixty homeowners had reported the post for terms-of-service violations. The platform banned her account for twenty-four hours.
Worse for her, three separate neighbors posted their own security feeds of Jackson's late-night break-in, complete with clear timestamps. The narrative in the comments flipped instantly:
*"Wait a minute... her son is the one actively breaking into houses?"*
*"How many times has this kid been arrested this month?"*