This is going to sound cold, but I need to know if I made the right call.
18 months after my ex-girlfriend told me she'd cheat if I took a high-paying job that required travel, I am living a life I never thought possible. And people keep telling me I should have compromised or worked it out.
Honestly, I am starting to wonder if I am too pragmatic about relationships. But the data keeps proving I made the correct decision.
I am Garrison Kincaid, 32. I work as a project manager for a heavy industrial construction company.
I started as a millwright apprentice at 19, worked my way through every position on the floor, and eventually moved into project coordination without a formal engineering degree. Just experience, problem-solving skills, and the ability to see how complex systems fit together.
18 months ago, my relationship with Presley Carmichael ended over a job offer. Not because the job was dangerous, or illegal, or morally questionable, but because it required me to be away from Denver for extended periods.
The offer was $640,000 annually, more than double what I was making, with a schedule of 4 months on site, 1 month off.
The work sites were remote, harsh conditions. Places like the high Arctic in Alaska, offshore platforms, mining operations in places most people cannot find on a map.
Presley's response to this opportunity wasn't concern for my safety or questions about the long-term career trajectory. It was an ultimatum.
Turn down the offer, or she would find human company elsewhere while I was gone.
Not a conversation about whether we could make long distance work. Not a discussion about what we would do with the massive increase in income. Just a straightforward threat that my absence would justify infidelity.
I handled it the way I handle construction problems. Assessed the structural integrity of what we had built, recognized the foundation was compromised, calculated whether repairs were possible, and determined the relationship was unsalvageable.
I accepted the job, ended the relationship that same night, and left for the Arctic 2 weeks later.
For 18 months, I have stuck to that decision. Worked brutal rotations in some of the harshest environments on Earth, banked more money than I ever thought I would see, traveled to places I had only read about, and built a life that looks nothing like what I had in Denver.
The no contact thing wasn't about being vindictive. It was about recognizing that some relationships reveal fundamental incompatibilities that cannot be negotiated away.