She wanted to know where I was going, who I was meeting, what we did together, but she'd ask in this condescending way, like, "I hope you're being safe out there." Or, "Just remember, some women are only interested in what they can get from you." I kept things vague because honestly, what was I supposed to say? That I was having the time of my life with someone who made me feel appreciated again. After about 3 weeks, I could tell Amanda was getting anxious.
She started coming home earlier from her own dates and got this tight expression whenever I mentioned I was going out. She also started making these little comments like, "Remember, this is just for fun, not for falling in love." Bruno's take on this was perfect. She's acting like a kid who gave away her favorite toy and now wants it back because someone else is playing with it. Except the toy is you.
And you're not stuffed with cotton. You're stuffed with common sense. One night, she tried to initiate intimacy with me for the first time in months. She came into the living room wearing this lingerie I hadn't seen in forever, clearly expecting me to jump at the opportunity. But honestly, I wasn't feeling it.
Between her recent coldness and the fact that I knew she was sleeping with Rick, the whole thing felt gross. "I'm not really in the mood," I told her. Her face went through about five different emotions. "What do you mean you're not in the mood?" I'm your wife and I'm allowed to choose who I want to sleep with just like you are.
I said that was the whole point of the open marriage, right? She looked like I'd slapped her. That's not the same thing. You can't just reject me like I'm some random woman. I'm your wife.
How is it not the same thing? You've been out there exploring your options and now I get to explore mine. That includes choosing when and with whom I want to be intimate. You're being ridiculous. Wives have certain rights in a marriage, and you can't just decide to ignore them because you're having some midlife crisis with dating apps.
She stormed off to the guest room, and I could hear her on the phone with Britney, probably complaining about how unreasonable I was being. The irony was incredible. She wanted the freedom to see other people, but expected me to still be available whenever she felt like it. The turning point came when I decided to invite Valyria over for dinner. I told Amanda that evening that I was having a friend over for dinner the next night.
She asked who, and I said it was someone she knew from college. When Valyria arrived looking absolutely stunning in a simple black dress, Amanda's face went through about five different emotions in 3 seconds. Dinner was incredibly awkward. Amanda was fake polite to Valyria, but kept making these subtle digs about how Valyria was still playing the field and must be having so much fun being single. She also made comments like, "Some people never learn to settle down."
And I guess not everyone is cut out for real commitment. Valyria, to her credit, was gracious and actually tried to include Amanda in the conversation. The whole time, I could see Amanda watching how Valyria and I interacted. How Valyria laughed at my jokes. How she asked follow-up questions about stories Amanda had clearly stopped listening to years ago, how she complimented the dinner I'd cooked instead of critiquing it.
After dinner, Valyria asked if she could see the Impala, and I proudly showed her out to the garage. I could see Amanda watching us through the kitchen window, her face getting darker by the minute as Valyria admired my work. After Valyria left, Amanda waited exactly 30 seconds before losing her absolute mind. When I told Bruno about the dinner later, he was dying laughing. So, your wife's college roommate shows up looking like a snack, actually appreciates your work, and Amanda's watching through the window like some psycho neighbor.
Bro, that's not dinner. That's a telenovela episode. What the hell was that? Amanda screamed the second the door closed behind Valyria. I played dumb.
What was what? You brought Valyria here to our house? Of all the people you could be seeing, it had to be her. I thought you'd be happy to reconnect with an old friend, I said, which only made her angrier. Don't give me that bull.
You know exactly what you were doing. You brought her here to rub it in my face because you know she's always been everything I'm not. Rub what in your face? the fact that I'm dating someone like we agreed, not someone like her. Valyria's always been the one who gets everything handed to her. The guys, the attention, everything.