So here's the deal: I've had time to digest this whole thing, and I've done nothing but think about it over and over. Looked at it from every angle, studied all the little pieces, considered everything that happened and all possible outcomes.
What she did all those years ago was a very stupid, selfish, cruel, heartless, bad thing. What she did breaks my heart like it's never been broken. But my heart will heal. Life is full of joy and pain; this is a time of pain, but there will be joy again. I try to be a strong person. I have had my time to lament this and examine it in every way. I know my course of action and will not waver on it.
Tomorrow night before dinner, I'm going to tell my wife that she's been a wonderful wife to me and mother to our children. I couldn't have asked for a better partner in life to share the joys and endure the hardships with. As she has told me, I will tell her that my heart has belonged only to her since the day I met her at our after-school part-time job in a local retail store when we were 17 years old. I've always loved her and still love her. Every day I thank God that she is in my life and my wife, even now.
Tomorrow night, I'm going to tell my wife that I forgive this foolish thing, and that aside, she's still been the finest wife and mother to children that a man could ever ask for in life. We will have a good cry, and hug and comfort each other. Then we will go to dinner, and maybe go see the new version of *A Star Is Born*, and have a wonderful anniversary.
I will love, honor, and cherish my wife as I have for 33 years, and she has for me. I will love all my children as I always have since the days they were born. I will be strong and the leader of my family for any of them that need to cry about this, talk about this, or whatever, but I will not speak of it again. I know what happened; I can't change it. We will survive it together. I refuse to let this tear us all apart.
As odd as it is to say at 51 years old, I think we may have just grown up. This has been a gut-wrenching experience, and I'm sorry for everyone that goes through something similar. It hurts. I'm the last person to give advice on it, but I'd encourage any of you not to let it destroy you, as I considered doing in the beginning. Be strong and good luck.
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**Update (in Albuquerque):**